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GUEST POST: How to Keep the Spark Alive?


You are no longer excited about monthsaries and/or anniversaries. Good morning texts are getting less. Late-night conversations become fewer. You don’t cuddle any longer. I love yous are even forgotten at times.

Are you familiar with all these? If yes, chances are you’re losing excitement and crave towards your mate.

Over the course of a long – time relationship, keeping the spark alive has become a major challenge for couples. The loss of passion towards one another is one huge killer of relationship since it is associated with being bored.

In fact, survey found that 75% of couples lost their passion in their relationship and it starts to fade after three and a half years. Three out of every four couples say that their relationship has lost its spark and more than a fifth declare they were stuck in rut with their other half.


  • Only one in four couples say their relationship is still fresh and exciting
  • Many say it’s hard to keep relationship fresh once daily life gets in the way
  • Turning down sex for an early night is a sign that the sparkle is fading

Whilst the initial part of the relationship is truly blissful, being in an everlasting frenzy will necessitate some actions.

Relationship requires work – lots of ‘em.

And to make it last, it’ll need continuous effort of both sides. As they say, “It takes two to tango.” With that, the couple is equally responsible for making their relationship as fiery as possible.

Ever felt your relationship needed some set alight? If you sure want to hold on and you love him as much that you don’t want to end everything just because of the lost kindle, learn to reawaken that enamored flames that once engrossed both of you by following the below range of things.

1. Start dating again.


Here’s the thing: the possible reason why you lost appetite is because you both recognized the need to be practical, maybe to save for settling down (if not yet married) or to use up for children (if you already have). And so, you two have decided to lessen your frequent dates and hang outs. You focused on your career so as to save. But that’s absolutely wrong. Do not compromise your being together for the sake of investment. Your relationship, too, needed an investment – not only in financial terms but also with time.

Do you recall the time when you and your partner are initially dating? Remember that ecstasy of then getting – to – know stage? You were both excited to discover certain aspects of each other’s personality. You were then too enthusiastic with the knowledge that you’re about to meet him.

Take it back to that period and begin designating a time to be alone with your partner. Be sure to free yourselves from disruptions and interruptions. Disconnect to everything to connect with your partner. Revive all the activities that made you two fall in love in the first place.

2. Be random.


Being in a length together, everything you do has probably become tedious and routine. And so, what you might be needing is a little randomness. Do new and unexpected things that you two has never tried before as a couple – may it be hitting up an insane roller coaster ride, winding through a known scary city or hunting of hidden treasures. 

It sounds counterintuitive but incorporation of spontaneity can make a huge difference for partners. Put a little spice in your daily lives – cook together a rare dish or prepare his favorite breakfast.  Randomly massage his head and shoulders whenever he’s tired and complaints how wearing his day has been. Make his coffee extra special by putting a little note on its cup. Make his tie and tell him how good looking he is in his suit.

It surely would return that gone bliss.

3. Take some effort to look good.

look good

Do you remember that time when you are so enthusiastic to meet your date who is now your other half? Do you recall getting all dolled up for his very eyes?

One serious mistake most couples do is being too comfortable with their partners that they abandon the idea of taking care of themselves. They no longer put extra effort to look good in front of their significant ones, the reason why appetite has gone.

Making an effort to appear as attractive as possible will surely build the spark you once had. Plus, it’ll provide your partner a sense of pride.

Though physical attraction is not a dominant factor in your relationship, it won’t necessarily mean that your partner would not go weary looking at you.

You don’t need to be stunningly beautiful everyday but putting a little effort goes a long way.

Author Bio

Wade is an essayist at wedoessay.com He incorporates nature’s beauty in his writing. Besides excellence, he puts his lovely wife and two kids at the center of his craft. He is fond of physical contact sports and considers South America as a haven for tourists.